Karen Answers Laquonda

Comment by Laquonda on August 1, 2008 8:24 pm

Dear Karen

How do you think your children were effected by you and your husbands illnesses?

Dear Laquonda,

I believe my children were affected more by my ex-husband’s alcoholism than my multiplicity. My alters were created to help me survive, keep us safe, and help me live as normal as possible. I never shared with them what happened to me as a child, or how my husband treated me. I never brought my past into their lives. That’s not to say that living with me had no ill affects.

I believe I was a good Mom. After my daughter read my story she told me she was amazed at what a great mom I’d been, despite what I went through. I know my son would agree. My children were happy and never once missed any event or practice, never were late for school, and always had all that they needed to feel loved and cared for. They never asked why I was a certain way; I was normal to them.

During my marriage my husband would become angry and verbally and physically abusive towards me. My children witnessed these moments and were frightened. My ex-husband’s alcoholism was hard on all of us. This wasn’t an everyday event, but it happened enough.

Once my children asked me why I saw Dr. Baer. I told them he was a heart doctor who was helping me stay happy and well. My alters vented in the safety of Dr. Baer’s office and not in front of my children at home. My alters protected my children, and never would let harm come to them.

Karen

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