Karen Answers Cathy

Comment by Cathy on September 15, 2008 10:35 pm

Hi Karen!

I’m still reading the book (actually listening to it as book on CD) and finding it very, very interesting! I’m at the part where Katherine is about to be integrated. I AM SO SORRY THESE THINGS HAPPENED TO YOU! I’ve been wondering through this whole book if anyone was ever punished for what they did to you. The priest, the men who worked for your father and grandfather, the policeman, some of them have to still be alive. What happened to your friend Scott, and the little girl who lived near you, the one who was whose house you were at when the bad guys through the dead bird in the air? Why weren’t your brothers abused? I also wonder if your mother read the book. You are an amazing woman to make it through all you did. Thanks for reading my letter and taking the time to reply. Cathy

Dear Cathy,

Thank you for listening to the book on CD! I listened to parts of it, too, and the voice of James sent chills down my spine. I appreciate your concern and saying that you are sorry these things happened to me. I am, too. And I pray my story will bring awareness and help others to survive.

You asked some very good questions. As far as I know, all of the men who have abused me have died I believe they were all punished in their own way. The policeman committed suicide, two died from alcoholism related illnesses, and two from cancer. I only wish I would’ve had all the knowledge as a child I have today regarding sexual abuse. I’m sure things would’ve been different. They all would’ve been imprisoned for life. I would’ve told someone, and if that someone didn’t do anything to help me, I would’ve told someone else and someone else. I never knew that what was happening to me was considered child sexual abuse until my freshman year in high school health class. At fourteen, I thought all daughters were treated the same as I was. I pray no other child suffers from the same ignorance I once had known.

I’m not sure what happened to Scott, but I think about him from time to time. It’s my hope that he has moved on with his life. The girl, his sister, died at eighteen in an accident. My brothers were physically and mentally abused, but not sexually abused as I was. They are alive and doing their best to live their lives to the fullest. I believe my brothers weren’t abused because they were healthy boys, not sick as I was, and also because I always tried my best to protect them. Regarding my mother reading the book, no, she hasn’t, at least not to my knowledge. Since my father’s and grandfather’s deaths, I see no reason to share this part of my life with her. I have healed and have tried to accept the fact that she wasn’t there for me in the way I needed her to be.

I hope you find the rest of the book as interesting, and thank you,



1 Comment

  1. Karen,

    This book and your story are incredible. Thank you so much for answering questions like this. I have a follow-up question. I’m sorry if you answered it somewhere else already. You had 2 children who grew up in a very interesting household. The book doesn’t spend much time describing your children’s lives as you went through 18 years of your therapy. How did the changes that you went through in combination with an abusive father impact them? How did their lives turn out? How were you able to help them cope? Have they read the book? Thanks.


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