Karen answers Frustrated Nellie

Comment by Frustrated Nellie on December 7, 2008 4:32 pm


I am so darn frustrated. I read your book and spent many hours trying to find how to ask you a question. Isn’t there an easier way. It’s so hard to get to you. I tried the website and came up with thousands of lines of information that didn’t lead me to ask you a question. If it weren’t for my BBF I would’ve said forget it. I almost forgot the question, actually I did. Oh yeah, What makes you so sure you will not dissociate again? What would forewarn you? I can’t buy that integration was complete. It just doesn’t compute? Oh, the book was a definite page turner. I barely put it down long enough to relieve myself.



Dear Nell,

I can understand your frustration trying to figure out how to ask me a question through our website.  Dr. Baer and I are currently working on resolving this problem by updating our website so that it will be easily accessible. We hope to have the new site up and running by the end of January. Please come back and visit us again!  I apologize for the frustration, but I’m glad to hear your friend was able to help you.

I surely hope I won’t dissociate again.  It’s been over ten years since my integration was complete and I haven’t dissociated since.  Of course, there may be the possibility that something traumatic could happen to me, but I don’t believe I’ll split off again.  I’ve been through some hard times during the past ten years, but I’ve not once fallen back to the old way of coping through losing time.

I admit, there were a few times when I wished I could switch to an alter again, and felt hopeless when unable to.  But I knew that dissociating would not make things better.  The fact is, losing time, switching into alternate personalities, was extremely exhausting.

Thank you for your compliment on Switching Time being a page-turner!



1 Comment

  1. I have discussed this concern with my therapist many times. She has very patiently explained to several of us that when we were very small and the abuse was happening this was the only coping mechanism we had, we did this to survive–we now have many alternative coping mechanisms that we have learned in therapy and we also have the cognitive abilities of adult available to help us cope with stressful and/or traumatic situations. She indicates the likelyhood of creating new alters or resurrecting ones that have already been integrated is very small.

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