Karen answers Paul

Comment by Paul on February 9, 2009 6:14 pm

Karen.

In the show USofT there isnʼt any way a DID patient would act in such a dramatic sexual manner. Agree? I am married to a DID patient and let me tell you, itʼs bullshit. Not one of my wife alters would act in the way Taraʼs alters do. My wife was sexually abused and no way was she like Tara. My wife never even walked around the house in her underwear. My wife felt ashamed of her body. Her alters were very skittish too. Where do you think this story line came from? What are alters supposed to do? and how are alters supposed to act? What about medication, do you agree there is a need for medication?

Paul

Dear Paul,

I have many thoughts about your questions. I realize USoT is a TV show, and not an accurate depiction of what I’ve experienced as a multiple myself, yet I am continually puzzled as to where the writers and producers received their story line from?  The common thread with alters is for them to work together to keep one functioning as normal as possible. I don’t see this in this show. There is also an exaggeration regarding all the “sex” talk. Since multiplicity comes from extreme child abuse, most alters have little to no interest in sex. If “Tara” was abused, as I assume she was if she were real, then her interest in sex would be less, not more. Multiplicity is a poor excuse for promiscuity. Maybe there’s more to it? I can only give my opinion from my own personal experience.

Second, in my opinion, true multiples can’t be successfully medicated. It was a wise plot choice to say that “Tara” is off her meds, and that is the reason for her alters to appear more.  I believe, in my case, medication disabled me, and once off meds, I started the true healing process.  Avoiding meds was best for me and my alters, but may not be best for someone who truly does need to be medicated for another reason.  I was stubborn.  I stopped my medication and didn’t share this with Dr. Baer.  I believe my healing started after the medication in my system wore off. 

Thank you for your thoughts and sharing a bit about your wife. I can understand your frustration with the show. Please know that “The United States of Tara” is not a show about my journey through healing with the real illness of multiplicity. Dr. Baer had worked very hard treating me.  There is no room for comparison. I am real. Tara is an actress in a TV show.

It’s true no two cases of multiple personality disorder/dissociative identity disorder are the same. I think the USoT is a show that is meant to entertain and bring forth much interest and future discussion. The show has also brought some people to read Switching Time in search of the truth about the illness.

Karen

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1 Comment

  1. Hi Karen,

    Very interesting what you wrote to Paul. In addition to his question I would like to know if your relationship with your husband and children was as open as Tara’s character in USOT? Did your children have a relationship with each alter by name and personality? Last question? Did your children turn out gay, dysfunctional, in any way bad because of your illness?

    Margaret Nell


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